16 Dec.

Infinity

i spent the whole day watching Steins;Gate, an anime about time traveling. it was absolutely engrossing to the point where i had nearly forgotten about my Friday night plans with the dudes. it kind of intrigues me how much time traveling is such a paradox to itself. you go back in time and kill a person before he commits atrocities, and in the future without that person, the need to go back in time to kill him isn't required, thus you don't go back in time to kill him and ultimately he does his crazy shit and, well you get the picture.

consciously, the idea of going to the two extremes of time (i.e. the beginning and the end) definitely interests me. the age-old debate of the existence of Jesus or missing links related to evolution would be silenced once and for all, bringing a whole new era of temporal evidence, or perhaps the crumbling of social/religious beliefs, and theory transforming into hard facts. these kinds of controversial issues stir the mind of a kid who grew up reading strange comic books and enjoying science fiction movies/cartoons to no end.

and yet, subconsciously, the thought of going back and undoing/redoing certain past events always comes to mind. what if i said that? what if i did that? what if i had flushed the toilet? what if i had said hi? what if i had told myself to save yourself from all the anguish by shutting your trap? what if? what if? what if?

in life, there is no such thing as a save point. i am consciously aware that everything i say, do, and think has its consequences. deal with it, because there's no way to reload the game from the last save point. i just hope that after all that happened, you know that i'm by your side.