20151019

Helios 44-2 2/58 pt. II

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the Helios 44-2 2/58 is probably my most underutilized lens in my repertoire. difficult to manually focus in the night time, but it produces incredible bokehs if you're willing to work for it (and by working for it, i mean taking several shots until you get the properly focused shot). prior to my residency in the realm of manual film photography, the Helios generally stayed in the dry box on account that i simply wasn't digging it as much as i thought i would - only taking it out a handful of times for some half-baked experimentations. manually focusing through the dim viewfinder of my EOS 400D means i get wrongly focused shots half of the time, plus the general narrowness of a 58mm lens in a crop sensor camera meant that this was ultimately a purchase for novelty's sake.

fast forward to 2015 - a little more seasoned in the manual focusing department thanks to my year in film photography, a full frame arsenal in my bag, and a deep sense of ennui all culminated into my digging out the Helios from its premature resting ground once again. it is as how i remembered it - still a bitch to use, especially in low light. that being said, when the shots came together, the results leave me incredibly satisfied. the shallow f/2 depth of field takes some work, but once you make the correct focus, the pictures come out sharp, though there is a hint of softness in the focus. generally the pictures have a layer of grey tint that softens the images, and when focused directly into a moderate light source produces a sort of "light leak" which occurs at the center of the photograph. the light leak - useful as it may be for certain aesthetics - can be rather frustrating at times, though it can be easily circumvented if one reduces the exposure or adjusts the position of the light source. being a non-native lens, proper exposure may be a little bit tricky as intentionally over- or underexposing may unexpectedly produce correctly exposed images, i've also taken pictures when the exposure is accurate as represented by the camera's exposure meter. makes for fun experimenting if you're generally up for it.

some years ago, another lens captured my imagination - the Helios 85/1.5. following the images down the rabbit hole ultimately led me to the Helios 44-2, and film photography in general. looking back, the Helios was meant to be a permanent fixture for the EOS 500N, though that camera wasn't as long lived as i expected it to, no thanks to the Flexaret VII - a minor distraction that completely overshadowed the prowess of this Russian lens. maybe i'm just going through yet another photography equipment phase, but judging by the first batch of photographs, it feels like i'm getting out of a photography funk i've been enveloped in since the end of 2014. but that's for the next entry (if i ever get to it).

20150904

The Muddy Confluence

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last year i made a list of things i wanted to accomplish before 2015 made its appearance. a rather significant reason i created the list was so that i could finally finish those last few rolls of 120 film. in hopes of exposing those rolls of film, i conjured up a photowalk that would've involved me visiting all the tourist spots i've yet to visit around Kuala Lumpur. alas, the photowalk never quite materialized - focusing to carry out my photowalks mostly in Putrajaya ultimately left me uninspired to make that trek to the muddy confluence.

fast forward half a year later post-Tokyo, i was engulfed in a strong itch to pound the pavements of some city. any city. one that possibly has some form of mass rapid transit. the leftover wanderlust was killing me, hence i made my way to the heart of Kuala Lumpur one fine evening in the midst of the Eid Mubarak celebrations. i didn't exactly ply the mass rapid transit as i planned to - this is, after all, a rather spontaneous photowalk (like most of my photowalks lately, really).

to be frank, Kuala Lumpur is no Tokyo. the climate isn't exactly conducive for a random photowalk. the streets were poorly lit and weren't pedestrian friendly. plus the backalleys are filthy and incredibly dodgy. all these factors didn't inspire any form of safety for yours truly. and in a rather surreal manner, the people on the streets mostly consisted of non-Malaysians! had i mistakenly teleported myself into the Middle East?

regardless, i made my way to Dataran Merdeka - a great spot for one to leisurely lounge about while getting baked by the relentless heat of tropical Malaysia. to no surprise, the Dataran was nearly devoid of Malaysians - substituted by the presence of blue collared foreign workers enjoying their day off on the first day of Eid Mubarak, and tourists taking selfies with their selfie sticks. unlike the squeaky clean parks of Tokyo, Dataran Merdeka isn't without its share of litterbugs, which certainly detracts from the experience of standing in a historic locale. admittedly, this is the very first time i've ever set foot on Dataran Merdeka - a somewhat historic feat for yours truly, and perhaps a catalyst to finally start discovering the streets of the muddy confluence. i've always believed that to know a city is to walk the streets and to take the mass rapid transportations. in this case, i feel that i'm completely unable to recognize Kuala Lumpur anymore. maybe i never knew her in the first place.

like i said, Kuala Lumpur is no Tokyo, nor is it Seoul, Taipei, or Singapore for that matter. it's time to get to know this muddy confluence a little bit better. maybe i'll find something to appreciate about her.

20150804

Tokyo On Film

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the last time i used the Contax T2 was at the end of 2012 when i made a trip down to Singapore. two and a half years later right before i left to catch my flight to Tokyo, i pondered for a good five minutes on whether i ought to bring the T2 with me. past experiences certainly have taught me that one shouldn't carry too many cameras with them, for fear of losing focus when deciding which camera to wield. past experiences (undocumented here, for some reason!) have also yielded that my T2 isn't up to it any more, especially when it came to focusing in the night time. the odd focal plane is fine and dandy if i were more into the spontaneity and oddity of slightly malfunctioning cameras, but most of the time i'd rather have my camera functioning as it is intended to. hence the good five minutes of second-guessing the T2's worth in this trip.

yet i couldn't help myself, because this T2 came in a packet straight from Tokyo - a film camera i had been pining for ever since i first read Tokyo Camera Style, coincidentally the tumblr blog that changed my view towards photography as a medium. a film camera that i boldly bid at the maximum amount i was willing to pay and woke up the next morning to find out i had won the bid. for a lack of solid rationality, nostalgia had won this round, hence i stuffed the camera into my camera bag. the T2 was consciously designated the secondary camera, and it shows because pieces of the whole are missing, yet it complements the overall picture, somewhat.

i'm not incredibly happy that i didn't use the T2 to its full potential, maybe because of my preoccupation with the DSLR and by the general fact that I WAS IN TOKYO. nevertheless, the T2 made a return visit to its homeland, took some pictures that turned out rather okay, and somehow still managed to achieve certain expectations. one of them being that the focus is absolutely fucked.

Contax T2
Fuji Pro 400H

20150802

Tomorrowland

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walking around the Minato Mirai 21 district, i recall echoes of a field recording off of a Godspeed You Black Emperor! track. the voice recalls the halcyon days of Coney Island, and how people don't sleep on the beaches any more. Yokohama harbour evokes the atmosphere of a long forgotten theme park teeming with nostalgists looking for lost memories they wish they had. bizarre architecture, the looming Yokohama Landmark Tower, the Cosmo Clock 21, the Osanbashi pier, the Yokohama skyline in the twilight, China Town - Yokohama is a curious mix of the past, contemporary, and the future. the kind of mixture where you don't mind lying on the beach (or in Yokohama's case, the Osanbashi pier) all night admiring the beautiful city lights. it is a city where the future is contemporary, and the past still etches its mark on the pavements. in Yokohama, it is always tomorrow.

20150722

Tokyo Skytree

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in my travels, i haven't had the opportunity to go up any observation decks at night. having being disappointed by the reflective glasses of the Tokyo Metropolitan Government Building, i thought it essential that i went up the Tokyo Skytree. i frankly don't mind paying exorbitant entrance fees to go up observation decks. heck, even the KL Tower has an entrance fee of RM50, so paying roughly the same price for other observation decks is definitely a no-brainer for me. Tokyo isn't short of observation decks, it was between the Tokyo Tower, Roppongi Hills, and the Tokyo Skytree. i chose the Skytree for its height (350m, perhaps the tallest observation deck in Tokyo?), and for its close proximity to my hotel. worth the entrance fee? any observation deck is worth any entrance fee for me!

20150719

Tokyo

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Tokyo - my biggest wanderlust after New York city. no other city encapsulates the organized chaos quite like Tokyo. deep in the bowels of the city, the insanity of the metro transit system contains the pockets of silence that is the train compartments - commuters locking their gazes into their cellphones, books, or perhaps catching a quick forty winks before the next interchange. up in the streets, neon signs buzz in epileptic intervals while pedestrians swiftly walk towards their predestined routes, never once knocking over the lost and amazed tourist gaping at the eye-catching, yet, unintelligible advertisements. the street crossings are crawling with people walking in a myriad of directions, like particles dispersing in randomized fashion, yet they each have an assigned destination.

in Tokyo, you will find solace among the discord, like a quaint cafe amidst the tourist-laden Asakusa streets. or the humbled Meiji Jingu sits in forested tranquillity amidst the contemporary and colourful Harajuku. there is this constant push-and-pull between opposing contrasts which makes Tokyo such a vibrant, beautiful, and lively city. my only regret is not staying here a little bit longer to absorb more of the splendour. i will be back, if only to walk the streets, or to be chasing trains in the labyrinthine metro system. more than that, i want to take more pictures.

20150528

Liyana Fizi Played Teenage Head Records, Subang Jaya [Record Store Day 2015]

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Record Store Day, or colloquially known as support-your-local-indie-record-store-by-buying-stuff day. is a relatively new scene in this part of the world where music lovers temporarily halt their charging of credit cards at online stores, haul ass to the nearest indie record store, and charge their cards there instead! presently, there are four cool indie record stores in the vicinity of Kuala Lumpur that stock fantastic vinyl records at prices that aren't Joe's MACs! yours truly has always had a pleasant time thumbing through the records and chatting with the owners of their respective establishments, and an even better time finding records that i don't have to exorbitantly ship from the U.K, or the U.S.!

but i digress. the fantastic Teenage Head Records recently hosted a Record Store Day event - a carnival of sorts with food trucks, crates of music to dig through, and best of all, free in-store gigs! it has to be said that yours truly's other (read: primary) interest besides crate digging in Teenage Head Records' RSD event was to catch Liyana Fizi's in-store performance. hell, it was free! and so was the parking!

i arrived half-an-hour before Liyana Fizi's scheduled performance and snagged a couple of awesome records (for the curious, it was Grouper's latest offering, Ruins, and the English version of Kraftwerk's Trans Europe Express) while checking out the band that was playing at the moment - Mystery Tapes. i told myself that the bloke in the center looked exactly like Zack Yusof, and when he spoke in between songs, i knew immediately that the bloke in the center that looked exactly like Zack Yusof was indeed Zack Yusof of 33RPM fame! today i learned that Zack Yusof has a band, and they're alright.

after a rather indifferent reception by the in-store crowd (all busy thumbing through records, i assume), an immediate influx of people entering the store signalled the advent of the next performer - Liyana Fizi herself. she came in discreetly and set herself up by the amp, with her camera crew poised and ready to shoot her opening number. it suddenly got crowded, and the air-conditioner started giving up the ghost - which kind of reminded me of a gig i attended last year where there wasn't even a hint of ventilated air in the hall. Miss Liyana opened her set with the tender Jatuh, and the crowd immediately fell into a lull, with only the sound of Liyana's lone acoustic guitar and her lovely voice. tender and intimate sounds about right in describing the overall vibe of Liyana Fizi's performance - the sound of my razor-like lens as it is searching for a focus point sounds like a sawmill in the room! woe is the cameraman with a noisy lens! halfway through her set, Miss Liyana bantered a little bit about being sweaty and received a song request from a gentleman in the back to play Ternyata, which is yours truly's favourite Liyana Fizi song ever. that song alone was enough for me to call this the gig of the year. Miss Liyana played a couple more songs after that, including one that paid tribute to a close friend of hers, Izaad Amir. it was a brisk five-song set, but it felt rapturous and soul-enriching. i'm guessing the rest of the air-con-busting crowd partly shared the same awe-inspiring feels as yours truly. sweaty and elated, the crowd dispersed and let the air-conditioner magically heal itself before the next performance - of which Miss Liyana encouraged the crowd to stick around and check out. jokes on her. i only came for her set!

outside, i got myself some Record Store Day souvenirs, thumbed through some more crates, watched the fans take selfies with Miss Liyana, worked up the nerve to approach Miss Liyana, and took a photograph with her. i bought some fantastic records, watched a great (free!) gig, got some pictures with Miss Liyana, and even got my photograph featured in Liyana Fizi's Instagram feed.

it was a good day.

20150418

The last rolls of 120 film

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Meopta Flexaret VII
Fuji Pro 160NS
Expired Fujifilm Provia 400 [Cross-processed]
Fuji Neopan 100

...and so i have finished taking pictures with my last six rolls of 120 film. fittingly, it had  to be taken using the Meopta Flexaret VII - my very first TLR camera that isn't a toy camera. before settling for the Flexaret VII, i had dreams of owning a Rolleiflex 2.8. through the rose-tinted viewfinder of Flickr and the endless reblogging of Rolleiflex photographs, i was smitten by the Rolleiflex's beautiful rendition of images and the camera's overall classy look. had it not been for the fact that the 2.8 Rolleiflexes went for at least a couple thousand bucks on eBay, i would've scored one in a heartbeat. instead, i had to consider alternatives such as the Seagull, the Lubitel, and the Pentacon Six that sadly got away. i cannot for the life of me recall how i came to discover the Flexaret line of TLRs, but i was completely sold when i came across an unbid eBay listing with a generous price tag.

from Slovakia, with love.

four years, and around 50 rolls of 120 film later, i've decided to retire the Flexaret. it is a great camera to bring around, and as i speak from experience, it was a great conversation piece. strangers have come up to me in awe and gaped at this old contraption, and wonder how people could still take photographs with these. it was the year 2012 when cellphone photography was at the brink of ubiquity, and there i was, lugging this camera everywhere i went on my second project 365 (366 for the year 2012). with that came my love/hate relationship with the Flexaret VII. the camera ultimately limited the types of photographs i was used to taking with my 35mm cameras. careful planning is required when taking photographs with the Flexaret, and it reduced the spontaneity i was used to with my other cameras. it was only a matter of time that i started storing the Flexaret deep in the dry box in favor of my other cameras - it also didn't help when i rediscovered my love for digital and all things VSCO Film. the TLR was relegated as my secondary camera, only to be fished out when the situation allows for a no frills photo taking session.

for a greater part of 2014, the TLR and my final six rolls of 120 film sat in my dry box - at least half of those rolls of film were bought way back in 2010. it was only with a sudden burst of enthusiasm that i finally hauled my arse out for some night photowalks around the vicinity of Putrajaya. those photowalks felt like therapy, because being drowned in work and not having the time nor motivation to go out and take pictures was a huge bummer for me. though i may have not executed some more ambitious walkabouts, i was rather happy that i finally got around to finishing up those last six rolls. i don't suppose they're the best pictures i've ever taken, but it's just me stretching my legs after a long period inactivity.

dropping the films off for developing was a wave of nostalgia for me - it had been a year since i'd stepped into the photolab. the price of developing and films had increased over the past year, and it was disappointing, though hardly surprising. the photolab hadn't been handling my films as carefully as they used to, but i didn't really care. it was an end of an era in my photography book. perhaps someday i'll revisit the ol' Flexaret should the desire arise again. i reckon it will in the next couple of years, who's to say that i won't get bored of my new digital camera after a few years of post-processing and relatively instant gratification? parting is such sweet sorrow, but my Flexaret will be waiting in the dry box.